"Don't ever feel useless because you are a beautiful soul and you have a lot of things in life, you're just waiting for those doors to open."
I'll admit, despite the positivity I try to spread, I do often doubt my self--my self worth, my usefulness, my everything. Something told me to text Lyndsey, just to say "hey." I've been trying to remind myself to do this regularly: reach out. It's hard to be 3,000 miles away from everyone and remember to always keep up communication; I'm easily distracted because this is still a new place so I'm still focused on here and now. But what she said to me, I needed to hear more than anything.
I get that right now, my life isn't that exciting. But I'm far from bored; I'm not some spoiled brat that thinks I don't have enough to keep my mind stimulated. Having said that, I can understand, when my friends find out that I don't do "much" (in their opinion) with my day-to-day compared to the constant busy lifestyle they were so used to from me, people being shocked or thinking I don't have much going on. But hearing that my day-to-day to someone sounds boring, that's all I needed to hear to break my spirit in half.
We all move at our own paces, and right now I'm fine with my pace. It's not as if I'm not trying. I have my resume floating around a few places, I'm just waiting for someone to bite. But I needed reminding that just because I don't have a title doesn't mean I'm completely devoid of purpose. I am someone, and I am someone to someone else.
I guess what I'm saying is, even when you're feeling completely down about your lot in life, you have to look at the positive. Go take a walk, listen to some music, remember why you're here. Don't ever feel useless.