Monday, April 5, 2010

To Touch



I am moving forward with a new chapter in my life. This new chapter is called "Touch."

My year as a freshman in college is swiftly reaching an end, and while I cannot remember every detail of every memory I still have within my grasp, I do remember the impact each moment had on my life. I remember all the times I was right, and most importantly, all the times I was wrong. I see the impressions I have made as well as the people who are only left with those first-time impressions. And I have discovered who I am and the person I want to be.

I have said it plenty of times: I want to be moved and move others. But I would rather talk about those who have moved me, not just what I think I have done in the face of knowing who I am. The very fact that these people continue to be present in my life proves I have left a mark on them, so to stroke my ego anymore would be a waste and too hypocritically pretentious. Just because it is my first time meeting someone does not mean they did not have a life before me. Their lives and their stories are just as important, and I want to know them.

To touch a person does not just mean to be some sort of Heavenly being that floats down to a person and changes their life. Touch is a sense to which works best when both parts can feel the change and are transformed by the experience. As much as I would love to help others, I need help, too. We all do. I want to build relationships. I want to reach out and have an extended family full of people who want to love just because love is something we all need. I want there to be assurance in everyone I meet that love is there, if they need it, much as I will from time-to-time.

If the stories are heartbreaking, I assure anyone who is to approach me, I can break their heart, too. But it is not about depressing people. Even people who have lead relatively "happy" lives still have something interesting to say. Often times, they are the ones with which I would rather surround myself. They are the ones, with optimism galore, who can lift me up when I am down. I cut myself off from most emotion before this year began. But I realized, fighting back tears is harder than letting them flow.

I would rather be a passionate person than a cold one.

I am learning, and I want to know what others have learned. What lessons do they have that they could teach me? I want to learn what it really means to touch a person and have them touch back.


18 comments:

  1. Sometimes when you meet someone they can be very closed off, but once they let you in they will be among the most loyal friends you'll ever have.

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  2. Glam Girl: Thank you! :)

    Little Ms Blogger: Yeah, this is very true. :)

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  3. http://www.notthatkindofgirl.net/what-kind-of-girl-i-was/

    http://www.notthatkindofgirl.net

    one of your followers follows this blog and i think you would enjoy it (dont ask me why i think so, i just do). just be curious. i wandered in there and i'm still there now and ... heck just go see it ok? 'specially talk about touch wow

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  4. Alright. Thanks for the heads up.

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  5. Argh...I can't just leave eprops...blogger smells...hehe..=P

    Nice blog entry...you should join xanga. =P

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  6. Keep the passion, Jennifer. Never let it go!

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  7. Profoundly Superficial: Thanks for commenting. I'm certainly going to try!

    JN: I had a Xanga. Hated it. Got bored with it. Deleted it. Not going back.

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  8. This is great. It's definitely better to be a passionate person than a cold one.

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  9. Your college years I believe are the most important because you get to meet & be touched by more people than you can ever imagine. This is a wonderful place to be in & a great phase. People help forge us into who we really are, & I wish you all the luck in the world. =)

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  10. "Touch" and the bird pix are subliminally powerful together. Dont just watch the birdie ... touch it. Whoa. And btw the pix are great too =).

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  11. Melanie: Thanks so much for your comment and wishes. :) I really hope the things I want to do happen for me. :D

    Anonymous: Thanks!! :D

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  12. I like this! Being passionate is a great thing, regardless of the emotion behind it. It's always better than being dull and lifeless. I loved my freshman year of college, but I am so much different now, in a few short years. That year though, really helped me find out who I was.

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  13. I'm glad you liked it. :) It can really open your eyes and help you discover things about yourself you didn't know before...

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  14. Spent some time here this evening, finally ,
    and your soul and heart are so beautiful. How you see is revealed in your photos that are stunning, and in your words, that are a gift to anyone who reads them. And I hope to you , as you process life and live intentionally.
    The best of everything always to you...
    glad to have met you here in the blogworld.

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